Val:
You have a big booty. You have a really big booty. It's like a REALLY big booty.
Mom:
what does it mean when people say "All I want for my birthday is a big booty hoe"?
Watching Nightmare Before Christmas with my mom
Mom:
Did they just say queer?
Me:
Yes
Mom:
hehehehehe
Me:
It means weird.
Mom:
Oh really I didn't know that.
Me:
You uncultured swine!
Mom:
Yo momma.
Dad:
WHO TAUGHT YOU HOW TO DRIVE?
Dad:
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!
Dad:
WAIT YOUR TURN YOU LITTLE BITCH!!!!
Dad:
Have a good day at school. Love you <3 <3 xoxoxoxo
Professor:
...Then there's some people that eat A LOT but never gain any weight.
Friend:
Uggh story of my life.
Me:
Oh boo hoo.
Aunt takes a photo of her and my brother on Instagram
Aunt:
Off early relaxing with my baby.
Me:
MY baby. Tell him I miss him.
Aunt:
Trick stay away this is my time with him.
She's so classy.
Me explaining what happens in the video for "Our Deal"
Mom:
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW bitch.
Mom:
You're not allowed to go out until you clean your room
Me:
Then I just won't go out.
Mom:
You're so lazy!!
Dad:
Don't you love crying? Like isn't it like a release?
Me:
No, I don't like emotion.
Me:
*Posts stupid picture of self
Aunt:
Girl, you need yourself a boyfriend. You have way too much free time on your hands.
Lmao!!!!!
Dad:
Yea so my friend was telling me about how him and his wife are having problems and I just said yea man that's tough. I mean, I feel bad for you son. Cause I have 99 problems but a bitch ain't one.
( 3 months ago) · Jan 29,2013 → 1 note
